Truly Rich and Blessed

3 Lessons on Love from the “Forevermore” Teleserye

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I must admit — I’m not a huge fan of teleseryes. Actually, I’m not a fan of TV in general (though I must admit it has its uses!). We try to limit TV/screen time at home as much as possible.

So you may be wondering why I’m writing about “Forevermore,” which finally ended its run on TV last night. The show, which my mother and mother-in-law (along with millions of other viewers, I bet!) love to watch because of its “kilig“ moments, ended with the two main characters, Alexander Grande III or “Xander” (portrayed by Enrique Gil) and Maria Agnes Calay or “Agnes” (Liza Soberano) getting engaged on top of a mountain, in the rain.

As with other teleseryes focusing on “true love” though, the couple had their share of difficulties and challenges before getting to their “Forever,” but I will not go into detail here (mostly because I didn’t follow the show closely in the first place, ha, ha!).

I will, however, share what I learned (or rather, recalled) about true love from watching the show. If you’re a single looking to be in a relationship, or are already in one, or even if you’re already married, I pray this will be useful to you somehow! 🙂

1. True love can change people.

forevemore

Image from TFC.tv

Xander was a “broken” man when he met Agnes. He seemed to have no sense of direction (coming from a broken family, which, in reality, really can cause one to have anxieties and problems) until a turn of events had him working in the strawberry farm owned by Agnes’s father.

Xander ends up a changed man — mostly because of Agnes, but also because of the La Presa community. True love, I believe, should come not only from one specific person but from other people around you, too.

Of course, it goes to show that the truest love ever can only come from God. If we refer to 1 Corinthians 13, we can see all the qualities of “true love,” as described by Saint Paul — qualities that describe our Lord Himself! 🙂

So, if you’re a single person looking for a spouse or are already in a relationship, try to keep Saint Paul’s description of love in mind. Try to live out those characteristics, too — because, in reality, if you want to experience true love, you should also try to change yourself (something which I am STILL working on!).

2. True love requires sacrifice, selflessness and hard work.

forevermore

Image from StarCinema

If you’re a follower of the “Forevermore” series, you’ll know that both Xander and Agnes had to make lots of sacrifices in their relationship. I believe this applies to any relationship, but especially that between husband and wife (or boyfriend and girlfriend who have a vision for marriage).

Also, being selfish will not benefit anyone in the relationship, and may even cause others to be hurt. Case in point when referring to “Forevermore” — Xander’s new girlfriend, Alexandra Pante, who was portrayed by Erich Gonzales, whom Xander ends up ditching because he realizes that he is still in love with Agnes. In last night’s episode, Xander made a joke upon Alexandra’s request, to make her stop crying.

He asked her, “Anong tawag mo sa fish na kasing guwapo ko?” to which she replied, “Ano?”

Xander answered sadly: “Sel-fish.”

So yes, we must learn to be selfless when it comes to love (refer again to 1 Corinthians 13).

We must also be willing to work hard at our relationships. We must be open to each other, and willing to forgive each other when needed. (Yup, still working on this myself, too!)

3.  When it comes to true love, there is no such thing as “happily ever after.”

Let me tell you a secret (ok, so it won’t be a secret anymore now, but still) : Last week, my husband and I got into a huge fight (gasp! YES, we’re human! We’re not perfect!).

I won’t go into the details, but it was mainly because of a lack in communication mixed with insensitivity (mostly on my part). Both of us were very, very hurt, and we only patched things up after a few days of being away from each other (the fight happened just before the kids and I were about to leave home to spend time with my mom).

Why am I telling you this? Why am I so “my-life-is-an-open-book” sometimes?

Because I want you to know that love — true love — isn’t a “bed of roses” all the time. In fact, there is no such thing as “happily ever after.”

However, by God’s grace, there can be a “happily along the way to the true Forever.” “Forever,” at least in my opinion, is eternal life with God. The journey to that Forever can be happy, whether you are married or not.

If you are married though, it can be a lot happier if you let God guide you and your spouse, and put Him at the center of your relationship.

forevermore

This is us, one week after the fight. Happy and working on sharing true love with each other.

SO… if you want to experience “Forevermore” in your own life, remember these three points.

Most of all, remember that God is the ultimate source of True Love. Before we can love others, we must allow Him to love us, change us, mold us (yup, another thing I am still working on!). It is He who can transform the ugly into beautiful, the sinner into saint, the love-less into love-filled! 🙂

What lessons on love did you learn from “Forevermore”? If you’re not a fan of the show, do you have lessons on love that you’d want to share with us? Feel free to leave a comment! 🙂

 

On Taking Time to Honor Our Spouses

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I know I said my next post here would be all about my goals for the year, and my “One Word” for 2013. I already have it drafted but I’m just waiting for the graphic to go with it. (I’m SO excited about this, really! I hope you’ll stick around so I can share the post with you once it’s ready!)

In the meantime, allow me to take this time to honor my husband. We celebrated our seventh wedding anniversary on Monday, January 7, and I got all mushy and decided to dedicate my post for the week on Philstar.com to him and our love story. I realized that, when it comes to having a healthy marriage, it’s the little things that matter. 
Our latest couple photo 😉
I hope you’ll take the time to read that post, if you haven’t already. Just hop on over here. I’d love to know how you honor your own spouse, too, so feel free to leave a comment below. 
Leaving you with these beautiful words about marriage from EWTN for now (emphasis mine):
A sacrament is a visible sign of an invisible reality. Matrimony is a sacrament and as such it is a sign to the world of the invisible God living in our midst – the living God who bears fruit in the lives of two people. They are a continual sign of His Power in the world. There is special grace and power within every couple God has joined together. Everything they do singly or together, is a living out of their sacrament. Simple things like washing dishes, running a sweeper, driving to work, struggling to make a living, budgeting a small salary to meet big expenses – yes, these and al I the other facets of life together, have power hidden within them to make them holy. Married life is the ground of holiness, love is the seed planted by God. Life together with its agonies and joys, pain and sacrifices, frustrations and tensions, moments of exultation and despair, all act as the rain and sun, thunder and lightning on a young sprout.

The faults and weaknesses of each one are compensated for by each other’s virtues. Each possesses what the other lacks. This results in a loving dependence on each other for spiritual growth and transformation. If a married couple can form a habit of looking at each other in a sacramental way – seeing the beauty of God in each other’s souls – seeking to enhance that beauty by upbuilding each other- mutually growing in the image of Jesus – then that Sacrament of Matrimony bears the stamp of the living God.

If you’re married, I highly encourage you to take the extra time this year to honor your spouses. Take the time to see the little things they do for you and your family, and let them know how much you appreciate them. Believe me, it will make a difference somehow.

Of course, relationships, especially marriages, that have God at the center, will be even more blessed! I know it’s a struggle to do this — to be in a “love triangle” with God and your spouse — but I’ve learned that, despite the challenges, you’ll find that married life will become so much easier.

Let love be sincere; hate what is evil, hold on to what is good;

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love one another with mutual affection; anticipate one another in showing honor.

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Do not grow slack in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord.

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Rejoice in hope, endure in affliction, persevere in prayer.

Truly Rich Reflections: Almost 11 Years And Counting…

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Last Saturday, my husband and I celebrated our sixth wedding anniversary.  Prior to getting married, we were together as boyfriend and girlfriend for almost five years. (It was a rather rough ride though, with most of those years spent in a long-distance relationship, as we were both missionaries for our Catholic youth community back then.)
Celebrating our sixth wedding anniversary over coffee (well, hot chocolate for him!) and cake

A lot of people who know us now don’t know that we didn’t get together under the best of circumstances – you see, it was a rather whirlwind romance for us, and many people, including our families, leaders and mentors in our youth community, did not approve so much of our getting together so quickly. (On hindsight, we know they reacted that way only because they love us and wanted us to be very careful and discerning before making any major decisions!)
This is Anthony and me a few days BEFORE we became boyfriend and girlfriend. Hehe!
Most people also don’t know that during our relationship, we almost broke up A LOT of times, and at one point, I even considered becoming a nun! We also went through many “periods of darkness” (though I don’t want to elaborate on that here – maybe I’ll `fess up about it here sometime, tee hee!).
Now that we’re married with two beautiful kids though, and, thank God, quite happy with where we are, I look back and can only say that it is truly by God’s grace that we’re together.

{This is just part of a post I wrote for my contribution this week to philstar.com’s unBLOGGED section. To read the entire post, which includes Ten Tips For Married Couples, (though not originally written by me) please click here.}

5 Tips For A Happy Married Life (Happy Anniversary to us!)

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5 years ago, I said “I do” to the man I know God chose for me. Before God and about 200 friends and family members, we committed to love each other and stick by each other for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, till death (others would say DEBT! hehe) do us part.

It’s been 5 years of lots of ups and downs, trials and triumphs, joys and pains. We were blessed with a honeymoon baby and 3 years after, with a baby conceived on mission! The first 5 years of our life together (engaged to married couple) were spent on mission, as our humble offering to God for all His goodness.

Of course, our married life has not been a bed of roses all the way. Just as with anything else in our lives, there have been some thorns (well, to be honest, LOTS of them! LOL!). But it is safe to say that we at least know how to have a happy married life (now all we need to do is implement and live out all we’ve learned! hehe). Here are some tips for married couples, engaged couples, couples who are considering marriage, and singles who wish they were couples but haven’t been able to find THE one yet:

1. Love triangles are the BEST. But only if God is at the center of the triangle. Hubby and I learned this through our community and saw this in action in our parents’ lives. With God, any couple can stand united through all unimaginable things. PUT GOD AT THE CENTER OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP. He should be your no. 1 and NOT your spouse.

2. Quality time is important. Quality time does not necessarily mean QUANTITY time. When hubby and I got married, we thought that we’d have at least one year to relish our newly married life, especially since my ob-gyne said it may be hard for me to conceive since I have a polycystic ovary. But lo and behold, God’s plans and ways are different – we got married January 7, Timothy was born October 10!

Married life after having a baby is so much more different. A lot of times, I was guilty of putting the kids’ needs over hubby’s, giving only my “left-over” time to him. I realize now that that should not be the case. HUSBANDS AND WIVES SHOULD ALWAYS HAVE QUALITY TIME TOGETHER EVERY DAY. It could be a quick chat over breakfast, or a late night gab session while nursing the baby. You could watch your favorite DVDs while the kids are asleep, or pray together before you both leave the house for work. What is important is we MAKE TIME.

3. The power of touch can do wonders. In Gary Chapman’s , the various ways and means of communicating love are explained. I for one, being a licensed physical therapist, believe in the healing, affirming, soothing and relaxing power of touch. I highly recommend touching your spouse every day, in little ways. Hugs, kisses, pats on the shoulder, brief back rubs, holding hands, even simple “high fives” – all of these help show how much we love and care for the other. TOUCH YOUR SPOUSE TODAY IN THE MOST LOVING WAY YOU KNOW HOW. And do it every day henceforth. You’ll see a difference in how you communicate and relate to each other.

4. It ain’t over till it’s over. Here, I am referring to the “discovery” and “getting to know you” stage. This doesn’t stop once you’re already married – in fact, it should continue until “it’s over” i.e. your marriage has ended naturally meaning one of you has already passed on. GET TO KNOW YOUR SPOUSE EVERY DAY. Ask him questions, pick each other’s brains out, get to know her current favorites, discover each other’s new favorite hangouts or hobbies. It ain’t over till it’s over. 🙂

5. Forgive and forget. Let go and let God. There will never be a lack of misunderstandings, tension, conflicts or disagreements in our married life. After all, as one author puts it . God made men and women different for a purpose. The challenge for married couples is to understand these differences, forgive each other’s faults, forget each other’s failures, and let God take control.

I am by no means an expert on love and marriage. But being in Couples for Christ has helped my husband and I a lot in our married life (and even in our lives as young adults and single working people). In fact, these past 5 years of marriage have been greatly enriched and blessed by the Lord through CFC. Thank You God for Your grace! Now we only have to apply all we’ve learned every day.

How about YOU? Do you have tips that you’d like to share? Pls. feel free to comment below. Praying for you!

Of Husband And Wife – A Truly Rich Love Story

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This one is dedicated to my hubby. I have been blogging since January 2010 about varied topics but this time I’d like to post a special entry for Bebs (hubby and I call each other “Bebs”. This has evolved over the years from “Be” [pronounced “Bay”] and we have our own funny story behind its “evolution”.) Anyway, I’m rambling a bit na so I’ll continue…

Earlier, Bebs and I were blessed to have a sort of “date” time when my parents unexpectedly took our kids along with them to send my niece and nephew home. There was no electricity at home and it was SOOO hot so Papa and Mama and our two little ones joined my Kuya and family for a “joyride” in the air-conditioned comfort of our family van. So hubby and I took advantage of the time and went malling (one of our favorite past-times when we were still single and childless 🙂

Even though all we did was look at a few cellphone stores in the nearby mall to see if there were any good offers, window-shop a bit for (what else?!) stuff the kids might need, and have dinner at one of our favorite Italian places (yummy!!!), it was a blessed time for us as husband and wife, and a kind of “day off” for me. Don’t take me wrong though, being a 24/7 hands-on mom is not something I resent, but having some time for yourself is important too right? And of course, time with hubby. I once read somewhere that the greatest gift a father could give his children was to love their mother (or something to that effect 🙂 And I totally agree! (hahaha biased!)

Anyway, while hubby and I were having dinner, I also took the chance to ask him about our finances.

You see, in our family, he’s the one who handles the budget (don’t be shocked! He’s much better at it than yours truly!). I was seeking his assurance and affirmation that despite upcoming major expenses we would still have money left over to save and invest. He assured me that we did. It is a great feeling to know that God, through hubby (and of course our families too!), was taking care of our needs!

I only pray that more than that, we would also one day reach our goal of making passive income through multiple income streams, so that we too could be more of a blessing to others. Just as God’s love makes hubby and I truly rich, we want to share His love and riches to others too!

Personally, I really thank God for my husband. Even though we have our differences and arguments, our faults and misunderstandings, I can really say that he is the one God wants for me. We complement each other and work together and are each other’s earthly reminders of God’s heavenly heart. We are imperfect as individuals and as a couple but are perfectly loved.

Bebs, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Just as that unfamiliar to many E-Heads song goes:

I take one step away
But I find myself coming back
To you
My one and only
One and only you

For this truly rich wife, it’s only YOU. 🙂

I love yah Bebs! 🙂 Thanks for keeping up with my insanity! I am proud of you and am with you 100% of the way!

To all you WIVES out there, no matter what your husbands may have said or done, always remember that they are trying to LOVE you the best way they could. Even if they fall short so many times, and hurt us and disappoint us, we must never stop believing in their LOVE for us. And whenever times get tough, and the road is rough and bumpy and getting out seems the best way to go, STOP. Take time to PRAY. Never underestimate the power of a praying WIFE.

My prayers are with you. 🙂 Feel free to comment or contact me!
Our love story evolves around MISSION
(translation: MISSION FIRST BEFORE RELATIONSHIPS)

On mission as an engaged couple in Timor Leste (that’s the Cristo Rei statue up there). Before this, we had a long-distance relationship for about 2 and a half years, because he was assigned to Eastern Visayas while I was in Manila, then I was assigned to Borneo while he was in the Philippines, then he was assigned to India while I returned home to Manila. 🙂
We went home from mission in Timor to prepare for the wedding and by God’s grace were able to do so in ONLY 6 WEEKS! When you put God first, everything else will fall into place.

We didn’t go anywhere exotic for our honeymoon but spent quality time with each other instead. After a weekend stay in a hotel, we spent our “honeymoon” week at community activities, including a retreat in Baguio and our Annual Leaders Conference.

When we got back to Timor 2 months after the wedding, we were surprised to discover that our honeymoon had already borne fruit! 🙂 Look how precious and fully formed little Timothy Alan “Tim” is at 12 weeks!
Fast forward to four years, six months later…
Our family has been TRULY RICHLY BLESSED with the addition of our baby girl Rysse, who has just turned 1 last week. We have returned from our almost 5-year mission in Timor Leste and are now awaiting God’s next marching orders!
O what a blessed beautiful life we have! Thank YOU our Beloved! 

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