I have a confession to make. (Yes, another one. I know I’ve made these before, so please bear with me.)
I was a bit emotional on Monday morning while we were having our family prayer time, before my husband left for work — I started tearing up in the middle of our prayer, causing our kids to ask, “Mama, what’s wrong?” My husband already knew what was bothering me even before I said a word, and he gently reminded me that God is faithful, and He has never ever let our family down, ever. And I know, deep down in my heart, that what he said is true, and that my doubts and tears don’t do any good but still, I can’t help what I feel sometimes.
I know I try to be positive and upbeat and inspirational on this blog (and everywhere else, in general), but I am deciding to bare my soul today to you all, inspired by this honest post I read on Allison’s blog about writing the hard stuff. (Incidentally, Allison used to be one of my co-bloggers on World Moms Blog, and I personally love her writing!)
So (deep breath) here goes…
I am tired — mostly from wearing/carrying a baby around almost 24/7, while juggling homeschooling and other duties, including work (which I am still grateful for, Lord, yes I am, promise!)…
I am worried — mostly about our finances, and if I’m teaching my kids “enough,” and wondering if I’m doing right by them in all aspects…
I feel like I need a break. (Is this selfish of me? I know it isn’t but I still feel “bad” just typing this out.)
It’s been a little over a month since I’ve resigned from my fulltime job, and there are moments — albeit fleeting ones — when I wonder if I made the right decision. And yes, sometimes, to be totally honest, I miss the “peace and quiet” I get when I am at the office.
But then, I see my children’s faces and I try to focus on the present, on the now. On the blessing and honor of being their mother.
So I cast my cares upon Him.
This reflection by Sarah Young on FaithGateway is so apt for me today, so I’m sharing part of it with you all via a screenshot, in case you need to read these words, too (you can read the whole thing here):
I’m going to try to take a moment — probably many, many, many moments today, and every day — to breathe in the Father’s love.
I’m going to try to to rest in His grace daily.
I’m going to try to cast my cares upon Him constantly.
Won’t you join me?
How are you, dear friend? Are you feeling burdened today, too? I’d love to “talk” with you in the comments.
I am a stay at home mom and just left a good paying job to be a “mom”. Many well meaning people have talked me out of it but i know leaving that job was God’s answer to my prayers. I have an 18, 12 and almost 3 year old. It gets pretty tough at times and the worst of all is the feeling of being “unworthy” because career wise i know i could still do so much and achieve more. But as i have experienced with my older children, the sacrifice of motherhood full time will all be worth it in the end when we see our children become the kind of children that we wanted them to become as they get older- God fearing, obedient, independent and respectful. God indeed can sometimes ask us too much that we will feel at our rope’s end but He is also a well meaning God who knows what’s best for us. If it is possible to get some “me” time even for a while i hope you will be able to breathe a little and let your cares fly albeit temporarily! God bless you Ms.Tine. (this is also my first time to open up like this in any blog….)
Hi, Mommy Arra! 🙂 Thank you SO much for opening up to me — I appreciate your trust! Thank you for sharing your story — it is so encouraging and inspiring to know that there are other moms out there who have gone or are going through the same thing I am. Please, no need to call me “Ms.” — Tina will do just fine! May God bless you and your family abundantly!
Hello Mommy Tina. This is me again. I find inspiration in this piece because as mothers, so much is expected from us. I became a mom quite late and after going through a very sad phase in my life. I am and will be forever thankful that the Lord gave me the privilege of being a mom to the best daughter ever. She is beautiful in every aspect. She lights up my life! But many times I wonder if I am doing right. I find it too hard to concentrate on the now because of debts and obligations that have piled up beyond belief. Everyday is a struggle and I keep wondering when all these will come to an end. Many days I wonder what I have done to my life – I have let myself down, my family down and my daughter down. I want her to be proud of me, to be inspired by my life and my actions but my mistakes are far too many. I always wonder why the Lord has not heeded my pleas. I feel so depressed and desperate. Maybe my worries are way more complicated than yours but I thank you for giving us moms the chance to vent out our troubles through your site. I hope God can see my heart and send help my way. Thank you very much.
Hi Mommy Marie,
Thank you again for leaving a comment and sharing your thoughts with me. God is faithful and true, and I know I may not know the full extent of your problems, but He is definitely working things out for you. I hope you don’t mind my asking this but I will anyway — do you feel like you need counseling? You can log on to http://www.kerygmafamily.com if needed, or I can refer you to other counselors. If you need someone to talk to about your finances and help you make a practical plan or something, please email me at so I can refer you to someone too. Praying for and with you! Don’t lose hope! God bless always!
Hi, Tina! Like many moms, I chose to focus on taking care of my child instead of pursuing a career. I believe it is a matter of deciding what things you are willing to sacrifice. When I am lying on my deathbed, I do not want to regret that I didn’t spend more time with my daughter. My husband and I practice tag parenting; we could count on one hand the number of times we left our daughter in the care of another person. We are committed to caring for and educating her ourselves. “If you want something done right, do it yourself” is my approach to my daughter’s education. If I chose a career instead of being a full-time mother, I am certain that my daughter and my family life in general would be totally different (read: rich but unhappy). Imagine if you chose another path, how do you think your kids will turn out years from now? I know its cliché: Parenting is the toughest job in the world, but it is the most rewarding. (I know you know this in your heart.) Parenting brings out the best in you. Unfortunately (or fortunately) is also brings out the worst in you. Do not worry so much about whether you are teaching your kids enough. Think about whether you let them know and feel that they are loved unconditionally, and that you will be there for them, no matter what. Everything else will fall into place. Do not let worry or guilt waste another second of your precious time.
Thank you for your encouragement, Pia! 🙂 Praise God for parents like you — who have chosen to take a similar path as ours! 🙂 God bless you and your family!